That upswing can come any time now

As I write this, we are in the middle of Clean All The Things. Wednesday morning, Anya had diarrhea. Very C. diff-y looking diarrhea. I had alerted my daughter’s teacher to this fact, so when Anya complained of a tummy ache, her teacher sent her to the nurse. Anya had no outward symptoms of illness, but she did have something: head lice.

Anya has extremely thick hair that brushes the seat when she sits down. I have incredibly thick curly hair that hangs to the middle of my back when straightened. R has hair of a similar length, though it’s much thinner and finer. We all have lice.

It’s not surprising; we all sleep in the same bed. I guess what is surprising is that Kai doesn’t have lice. I am immensely grateful for this minor miracle; I can’t imagine treating him for lice. It’s been bad enough with the three of us. We spent close to 4 hours combing each other’s hair last night.

Today I’m doing laundry. Because a water main broke last night, and we were without water for the entire evening. So all that laundry I needed to do during the Great Lice Purge yesterday had to wait until today. Just my luck.

I’m also waiting on my daughter to poop, so I can drive small cupfuls of it to her doctor’s office an hour away.

I haven’t worked much lately, and yesterday I finally had a couple of long articles come in. But because of all this, I had to turn one down. So we are going to run out of money this month, and may not even be able to make rent. It’s so frustrating, because I’ve worked so very hard to keep us afloat and get a new job, and it’s just…not happening.

On the way to pick up the stool collection supplies, I listened to Hotblack on repeat. I was really feeling these lines:

Took a tip from a rodeo show
Get a grip or you’re gonna get thrown

I need to get a grip. Because things just aren’t getting better, and I don’t see how they will ever do so. It’s all just down, down, down.

Then I saw a homeless woman. “Living on a prayer,” her sign said. “Anything helps.” And I realized that things could be much, much worse. I know some people think homeless people are lazy mooches, but damn it, nobody stands out in the cold begging for money when their lives are going well. No matter what her situation is, she was obviously desperate enough to freeze her butt off in the hopes that someone would toss her a few bucks. So I did.

My life is sucking lately, but I’m not standing on a street corner in the cold begging for change. I couldn’t really afford to give her anything, but I did. And I felt much better for it.

December’s goals

Celebrate: I picked up a few inexpensive ornament kits for the kids to work on when they were sick/the weather was sucky. Good idea, that. Guess what we’ll be doing later today?

Meditate: I actually did quite a lot of this yesterday. It helped more than Hotblack on a loop.

Write: Not on paper, but if could just get a few blocks of time to write this stuff down, the first draft would be done.

Eat better: I ate half a pizza and three breadsticks for dinner last night. Enough said.

Review, evaluate, and plan: Healthcare.gov is harassing me to sign up for a health plan. And I will. Just maybe not this week.

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