Focus

It’s that time again. I don’t necessarily make resolutions anymore — instead, I determine my focus for the coming year. This year, I think a lot of that focus is going to self-care.

Went to the doctor yesterday. My ear started hurting Christmas night, and by Sunday my throat was so sore I could barely swallow. I don’t have an infection (thankfully…finding an antibiotic I can take while breastfeeding is not fun), but I do have fluid buildup and drainage. Rain = mold = allergy overdrive. And it’s pretty soggy out there these days.
My eyes are also driving me crazy. They are bloodshot and burn pretty much all of the time now, even though I use allergy eye drops several times a day, and I wake with them matted shut most mornings. I was starting to worry that my contacts may be damaging my eyes, but the eye doctor said my eyes look fine. Just allergies.
“Just.” Ha. I like that. I “just” can’t open my eyes when I wake up in the middle of the night.
I really need to get back on the shots. It just got to be too much for a while there, financially speaking. And also in terms of scheduling. It was so much easier when we lived in Memphis, and even then it was kind of a pain. But I need to get my allergies under control again. I don’t have time to be sick. (Don’t have the patience for it anymore, either.)
I have the tendency to put myself last. When R has to get up and go to work in the morning, bedtime is a strict affair. On my work nights, it’s more a suggestion. Granted, his job is far more dangerous than mine, so it is extremely important that he be well rested. But my health is no less important.
So on my list of goals for this coming year, I must include taking care of myself. Allergy shots and adequate rest and nutritious food and time for yoga and meditation. And walks; I need to start walking more.
As I proved these past two months, things fall apart when I put myself last. And then nothing gets done.
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